Choker

Second Chances?

Runner-up

Mr Sprewell was the winner of the Scrape Sports Award, until he was outdone by his new employer

We thought choking you boss was pretty low, but now we've found that there are other, bigger morons then him.

The Knicks couldn't wait to get him on their payroll. Sorry Latrell, the management of the Knicks will get the award this time

But maybe, just maybe, if you whine and cry a little bit, Dave Cheketts will take it down from his shelf and let you borrow it for a while.

Actually, you probably won't even have to whine that much. Just walz into his office and in you're best Dirty Harry voice say. "I want that award."
Chances are he'll move pretty quick.

Note: The Scrape Awards have not officially gone out yet. So far only the winner of the Sports Award has been decided.

We seriously doubt anyone could outclass the Knicks anytime soon.

Oh yeah and...

Scrape Magazine is a sister publication to FW News Service.

Sprewell Admits Other Acts Of Violence

Says He Choked His Chicken

New York, NY-- As the NBA lockout was lifted, a flurry of trade activity spread through the league. One of the most controversial moves has been the New York Knicks dealing for shooting guard Latrell Sprewell.

In an effort to head off an even more disatrous PR nightmare, Sprewell's agent suggested a press conference to clear the air for Latrell. In this interview Sprewell confirmed rumors that had been circulating that this wasn't the first time he has lashed out aggressively.

It has been learned that he has admitted to "choking my chickens" on numerous occasions, most recently, the day before he was traded to the Knicks. "I just wanted to come out now with this, before [the press] got out of control. I have had other problems with my anger and I am coming to terms with it, aight?"

Above: Witness and victim of several choking incidents involving Sprewell.

Sprewell, who lives on, and maintains a farm in the off-season, said he has never been convicted of assault on the chickens. Upon further questioning, however, he also admitted that on occasion he had "wacked his weasel"and "spanked his monkey" repeatedly in the past.

One chicken, who refused to be identified siting obvious reprisals, said in another interview that Sprewell actually seemed to enjoy choking his chickens. "I swear man, it was like looking into the eyes of the Devil himself. The whole time he was choking me, he was smiling and laughing. I was lucky to get away with my life. I feel bad for the monkey because Master Sprewell keeps him in the house, and on some nights you can hear the whimpering clear out into the barn."

Former Employer Speaks Out

"Sam" : I caught him with slab of meat in the bathroom. He was beating that thing like there was no tomorrow. I couldn't believe my eyes. That type of behavior is just not tolerable in a butcher shop.

Scrape : And you fired him on the spot?

"Sam" : No, he practically begged me not to, so I gave him a second chance. But about 2 days later, on my way back from lunch, I could see him in the window of the shop doing God knows what to a slab of baloney. I'll never forget that until the day I die.

Scrape : What was he doing that was so horrible?

"Sam" : He was...he...I can't...

"Scrape" : It's okay, I know this is painful for you.

"Sam" : I confronted him and told him to get out. He merely shrugged and said he was..."bopping" the baloney. That's what he called it! My God I can still see it!

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